What Did Camel-a (as Joe calls her) Say?

Camel-a's mentor:

professor Irwin Corey, Camel-a's mentor

Grandpa- how old is he really?

Subject: Grandpa

Subject:How Old is Grandpa...

Stay with this -- the answer is at the end. Don’t peek

 One evening a grandson was talking to his grandfather about current events.

The grandson asked his grandfather what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.

The Grandfather replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before:

' television

' penicillin

' polio shots

' frozen foods

' Xerox

' contact lenses

' Frisbees and

' the pill

There were no:

' credit cards

' laser beams or

' ball-point pens

Man had not invented:

' pantyhose

' air conditioners

' dishwashers

' clothes dryers

' and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and

' space travel was only in Flash Gordon books.

Your Grandmother and I got married first,... and then lived together..

Every family had a father and a mother. Until I was 25, I called every woman older than me, "maam". And after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir".

We were born before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy.

Our lives were governed by good judgment, and common sense. We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.

Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege... We thought fast food was eating half a biscuit while running to catch the school bus.

Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.

Draft dodgers were those who closed front doors as the evening breeze started.

Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends-not purchasing condominiums.

We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.

We listened to Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios (not so much this one, but I do remember listening to radio before we had a television).

If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan ' on it, it was junk.

The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam....

Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.

We had 5 &10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents. Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel. And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.

You could buy a new Ford Coupe for $600, ... but who could afford one? Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.

In my day:

' "grass" was mowed,

' "coke" was a cold drink,

' "pot" was something your mother cooked in and

' "rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby.

' "Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office,

' "chip" meant a piece of wood,

' "hardware" was found in a hardware store and

' "software" wasn't even a word.

And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby.

How old do you think I am?

I bet you have this old man in mind...you are in for a shock!

Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time.

Are you ready ?????

This man would be 70 years old today.   70 years ago was 1947.

Old age is Great!

Today I was in a shoe store that sells only shoes, nothing else.

A young girl with a tattoo and green hair walked over to me and asked, "What brings you in today,

I looked at her and said, "I'm interested in buying a refrigerator." She didn't quite know how to respond, had that deer in the headlights look

 

I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it

 

When people see a cat's litter box they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat" I just say, "No, it's for company!"

 

Employment application blanks always ask who is to be called in case of an emergency. I think you should write, "An ambulance."

 

The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

 

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. (This always works at my house)

Have you ever noticed: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL.

 

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he knows when he's really in trouble.

 

Did you ever notice that when you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "Theirs"

 

Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

 

Some people try to turn back their "odometers." Not me.

I want people to know why I look this way. I've traveled a long way and a lot of the roads were not paved.

 

Ah! Being young is beautiful but being old is comfortable.

 

Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth.

May you always have:

Love to share,

Cash to spare,

Tires with air,

And friends who care.